A story composed after a dream of Pearly gates
So Donald Trump finally dies after a long successful life as President of the United States serving two terms and handing off his throne to his sons, who both serve two terms. Nevertheless, age catches up with him and the singularity has not occurred so he journeys to the Pearly Gates where he is met by a gate keeper white soul with a long white beard and a meta-iPad version 36. "I would like to be considered for a place in Heaven" says the Donald.
The white soul looks down at his ledger, "We have been monitoring your progress Donald. It has been outstanding long since you defeated Hillary Clinton in the 2016 election. Let's see what your overall numbers say. The demand for Heavenly places has risen sharply with many claiming to have lived saintly lives based on principles espoused by Bernie Sanders. You are missing from that list. So what principles have you lived by Donald?"
The Donald with a long wide grin responds in a confident voice, "I love beauty, wonder, wealth and being very smart. I have followed the principles espoused by President Vladimir Putin of Russia. They served me very well during my Presidency of the United States. I understand Vladimir was admitted to heaven after he took Bernie Sanders as his patron and followed in true socialist principles. I am thinking that by adopting Putin's earlier philosophy I would meet your entry requirements." The white gatekeeper soul looked at Donald and said, "You, indeed, have an impressive record. Your numbers are really off the chart on the debit side by trillions through your total disregard and contempt for the Ten Commandments. You also totally disregarded Jesus Christ's new Covenant.
This poses a major problem for you. Have you considered making the journey on the downwards leading path to 'you know where'. I understand that you might be considered. We could put in a good word for you.
The Donald smiled meekly, "Thank you for your time. I was hoping that I would not have to go where all those Mexican criminals, rapists and Junkees would end up." The white gate keeper soul looked at his ethereal iPad and noted that Hades was completely devoid of nasty Mexicans. He looked to see why. "Donald, we have a wonderfully strange thing in our records. Apparently, Jesus Christ forgave all those Mexicans for their sins on the basis that their many problems stemmed from guns manufactured in America used by the drug lords to enforce drug addictions around the world and in America."
The white gate keeper then explained that that program had ended because Donald Trump has built a wall across North America to keep the Mexicans from entering America. Well, it had worked and had stopped American guns and bullets from reaching Mexico as well. The people all across the America's were so bolstered by this effect of the wall that they banned guns and legalised drugs and collected the guns all for recycling and used them to make barbed wire to keep American guns out.
The Donald reluctantly made his way to the fiery gates of Hades where he was met by a red bearded soul with a red ledger. The Donald asks the gate keeper to open the gates for him. The red soul says, "Wait a minute, I will consult with my boss as son as he ends his 'tissy' fit. He is in argument with Adolph Hitler, who does not want you to be admitted. Hitler's argument is that you became a friend of Vladimir Putin. So just wait!"
The red soul departs into Hades and returns after a very long hour. The Donald is waiting patiently. The red soul says, "I am sorry Donald but your application to Hades has been rejected by the Devil himself on the recommendation of Mao Tse Tung. Apparently, you have upset all the red souls in Hades because of your mischievous history, particularly, where you bear false witness against Hillary. I am sorry, but here in Hades, Hillary has become sort of a hero because of her stand on guns, even though you overruled it and jailed her and Bernie Sanders."
The Donald was heart broken once he realised that he had been rejected by both Heaven and Hell. He thought a while then decided that he would convert to the teachings of Bernie Sanders. As soon as he had done that a golden halo appeared over his head and Jesus Christ forgave him all his transgressions. The Donald now lives in Heaven in Trump Towers dedicated to converting white souls to the truths of Bernie Sanders. He even converted Hillary Clinton.
I am so happy this story has a happy ending!
Arthur
